January 07, 2017

Oops It's this year that is the 12 year anniversary of prognosis of 3 months or less to live

Mark Richardson is still alive and he claims he is doing ok. His diagnosis and prognosis were in Jan.-Feb 2005 so in last year's post when I said he had 12 and 1/2 years out from prognosis of 3 months or less to live, I had miscounted.  Mark is still living in Thailand just a very short walk on a private walkway to the beach.
We had been doing annual thank-God I'm alive trips in January each year with the last two to Cuba and to Vietnam. This year I couldn't go in January due to my own medical treatments so I planned a trip to India in the spring. Mark has no interest in India and wants his delayed Thank God I'm alive trip to be to Bali. He has been before but I have not. Hopefully we will get a delayed trip to Bali.

I looked at old blogs and Mark's formerly thick dark blond hair turned white and thin in the first 3 months of treatment. I see it in pictures of when we went to Amsterdam. Some of you may recall Mark was depressed and when I asked him about it he said he was sad that he would die and never get to travel. I asked him where he would like to go and he said Amsterdam. He was very sick and had no appetite. I wasn't sure he would survive the trip but a few visits to the coffee shops (for special smokes found in such shops) he was able to go to museums and out to eat and he had an appetite.  Mark's hair after chemo was finally finished turned from white to a dark gray and is once again thick.

Mark not only survived this cancer of the esophagus with metastasis to liver and bone but a separate unrelated kidney cancer that was small and slow growing and cored out at the VA in Houston several years after he was treated with a lot of chemo and radiation in Bangkok in 2005 and 2006 for his esophageal tumor with mets to liver and bone..

There are so many variables in cancers which affect who will live and who will not. No one's cancer is exactly like Mark's and there are so many different  treatment options now that we didn't have in 2005.  At that time people with stage 4 like Mark's often did not get treatment. In fact initially he was told here is some liquid morphine, go and get your affairs in order, you will die soon.  He couldn't find a doctor in Hawaii or the Philapines to treat him. He was a dead man walking...barely walking. Remember he was working on the island of Saipan when diagnosed. A call to MD. Anderson was made. They could get around to evaluating him in a month which would have been six weeks into his poor prognosis and he probably could not have handled the flights from Saipan to Guam to Japan to California to Houston to Austin and later back by car to Houston  He decided on his own to go to Bumrungrad Hospital in Bangkok which was much closer to Saipan than Houston. Treatment began as soon as he presented himself to the Horizon Cancer Center at Bumrungrad.  He got lots of chemo and lots of radiation.   The fact he is living is mostly due to Bumrungrad Hospital and Dr. Thera Umsawadee as both were willing to treat a man with stage 4 cancer.

So many decisions and so many variables but Mark gave it his best attitude and took all the treatments without complaining. He took strength in the prayers and letters and pictures and poems and kool aid and licorice people sent him.

I write this blog to help people gather strength to deal with the treatments for cancer and to give it their all just in case the treatments work and survival and remission or cancer free is the result. Some people decide they would rather die than go through the treatments. We're all different and make decisions differently based on our own unique needs and wants.

Myself, I want to live to be 100 and have a lot of candles to blow out and get a letter or a tweet from the president at the time. It's a challenge. I've just come thru chemo and radiation for breast cancer and my hair is short, curly and white.  We just had a 97 year old Aunt die from infection in her leg. She was given the option to have her leg amputated or die of the infection. She said she's die rather than undergo a leg amputation. We're all different. I can't say that enough. It's very true.


Carolyn C said...

Hi Betty! and Mark! Just finished your entire blog (which I hope is still ongoing) and was so very pleased to read of Mark's and your's and Stephanie's adventures, and all your friends and family. I read now that you are in a cancer battle of your own, I just wish the very best for you and continued health and fun times for Mark and everyone. Your blog inspired me and also it kept me going back to check up on Mark's progress, and with every day and year that he celebrated I cheered. Thank you so much for all your words, thoughts, and I'm so sorry for all the losses you both endured along your journey.
Carolyn C.

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MissBettytheMom said...

To Carolyn, thank you for kind words. I’ll update the blog soon. My breast cancer has gone. The chemo and radiation turned my hair white and curly. Mark’s hair was white after chemo and radiation...see picture of Mark and I in Amsterdam. Later his hair turned brownish blond again. We had many fun adventures....and the adventures continue....just that Mark is either reincarnated or wii be or he is in heaven. According to Thai beliefs some spirits are reborn 3 Days, some in 21 Days, 49 or 100 Days. That may be the reason for the 100 day ceremony. In some cases it happens in 7 years.

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